finally!!! (and some thoughts on grading)

well, that's it, i'm finally outta there. (except I forgot a CD in the classroom CD player and somehow I still have a couple of kids' papers and the elevator key! it's like a long strand of silly putty that gets thinner and thinner but just won't break...)

i've learned some important things in the last 24 hours... some humbling things.
1) It's impossible to be fair. The first few times I graded papers, I went back over the whole group two or three times to be sure I was being SCRUPULOUSLY fair. If I took off a point on M's paper for misspelling Euphrates, I better be sure take off a point on J's paper for the same mistake. If I said they had to have twelve facts, I better be giving the same less-than-perfect score for every paper with ten facts, every paper with eight facts, etc.

Well, screw that! When I start to get rushed, it starts to be, "that felt like an eight point answer, we'll give her eight points on that one..." Even though I know that I'm skimming, that I'm completely influenced by my mood and worst of all my preconceived notion of the student... I just don't have time to define and redefine EXACTLY what an eight-point answer is and make sure that that definition is rigorously, universally applied.

As I got down to the wire the thought crossed my mind, "ah, just guess--give 'em what you figure they'll get anyway." I resisted it, but I'm sure it's been done! I did figure out a much more legit version of the same process - when I'd graded the tests but not the projects, I put all the grades in excel and then printed two versions: one where everyone who'd turned in the project got the highest possible score, and one where they got the lowest score possible for a complete project. Then I only graded the five projects that would actually make a difference in anyone's grade.

(Yes, I went back and graded everyone properly later, but I was pleased with myself for figuring out a way to meet the deadline efficiently and ethically)

Anyway, it was all a humbling experience. Any further criticism I have about racism and bias and sexism etc in the classroom, and especially in the grading process--well, don't worry, I will still rant but with a lot more sympathy for the teachers who are in this impossibly structured and deadline-heavy position...

this really is an impossible job!

although when I was there this afternoon tidying up, with all my responsibilities gone, I started to really relax and enjoy the kids' company again, which was nice. It was good to remember why I do what I do and why I enjoy it...