military euphemisms

You know you've been working too much on your "Israeli-Palestinian struggle" lesson plan when you say to your wife, "We never use these plates; we should put them in the basement... in fact we should redeploy everything on this shelf..." Did I just say "redeploy"? About plates?

Redeploy is not my least favorite euphemism (that would be "pacify"), but it always makes me smile in a twisted sort of way. Redeploy is what you do when you don't want to retreat. It makes the point that you are operating from a position of strength, that you are simply moving your army, not withdrawing it, and nobody's making you do it, either. But it makes me smile because usually someone is making you do it, and so it always seems like a bit of a failure in terms of macho bluster.

It used to confuse me, because I thought it meant the army was "going back to" Lebanon or Gaza or wherever. No, it means the army is withdrawing from Lebanon or Gaza or wherever. We should have a list of military euphemisms for students... and for those rearranging their kitchen cabinets.